I have recently noticed that I over use the phrase 'thank you'. For instance, after I have given someone a flu shot, they often say thank you. I respond to this with, 'thank you', but why? Why am I thanking them? *I* did *them* a service, not vice versa. Sort of.
It is true the person chose to get a flu shot from me and by extension the Visiting Nurse Association of Colorado. In these times, when one has many choices of where to get a flu shot, it is nice that they have chose Colorado's only not-for-profit nursing agency, thereby supporting their community, etc. If this is actually that for which I am thanking them, however, I should be specific, so they remember the substance of the thanks and don't just brush it off as a stock answer. Although after saying to 70 people in a two hour period, it could very well be considered a stock answer.
I have also caught myself in situations where the 'thank yous' being exchanged seem to negate each other. For instance, after a colleague and I had finished a flu shot clinic the other day, we thanked the other -- for what? For doing our jobs? Or was something above and beyond the call of duty done for which to thank the other person?
I worry that 'thank you' is going the way of 'how are you?', which long ago became a generic greeting and not actually a question to which the other person wanted an answer. To lose this most basic expression of gratitude would be a shame. Then again, perhaps English speakers have always been too polite and this is just a move in the opposite direction to correct the problem. Now, before you give your top five examples of English-speakers' rudeness, hear me out.
In the three non-English languages I have taken at least a moment to study, there is no direct translation of 'you're welcome'. French and Spanish both use the equivalent of 'it's nothing' as a reply to 'thank you' and in Nepali one does not use the actual words for 'thank you' unless the person has done something truly spectacular. So, maybe against the backdrop of English-speakers' acute politeness at the back end of the interaction, a more casual use of the phrase at the front end is acceptable...?
On that last point, I disagree with myself, actually, and shall take pains to watch my language when it comes to the use of 'thank you' in order to preserve its integrity. Please join me in my quest to avoid the bastardization of our fine language.
Photo: Self-portrait of me and my newest scarf, patter courtesy of Vogue knits (I think) by way of Nine's grandma.
1 comment:
The basis of any market transaction, no matter how small, is a decision to trust and cooperate with another person. IMHO, we too often lose sight of this simple fact. We even speak of the market as if it were primarily about competition rather than cooperation, which I think is backwards. So, though, I find it odd that I say thank you even when the guy at McD's hands me my change, I don't find it inappropriate.
But, then, I'm an economist. So my world-view is naturally warped.
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